Title: All We Know
Author: CrystalSaber_1
Genre: Angst, Songfic
Timeframe: Pre-TPM
Note: The song "All We Know" belongs to Paramore
All We Know
We've tried so hard to understand, but we can't.
We held the world out in our hands and you ran away.
Obi-Wan stared at Siri. Her back was to him, her hands folded. She knew he was looking at her, but she refused to acknowledge him.
Obi-Wan sighed and bit his lip. He forced himself to move his eyes from Siri and to the Jedi Master at the front of the classroom. What he was supposed to be learning, he wasn’t even vaguely aware. He only had eyes for one person.
It had been one month. One month since they had pledged their love to each other, One month since he had felt more joy then he ever had in his life. One month since Qui-gon had discovered their secret. One month since she had forced him to leave her, forget her. They would be comrades, she had said. Not friends. Then she had ran away, left him, refused him.
It takes some time to let you go and it shows.
He had been-and still was-devastated. How could she? Hoe could she turn away from what they had together?
Cause all we know is falling, it falls.
Remember, cause I know that we won't forget at all.
He wanted more than anything just to wish away his feelings, but it was impossible.. They were undeniably there, and forever would be.
“We have to forget” Siri had said. “We must forget that we ever felt this way for each other. The audacity of her statement struck Obi-Wan as darkly humorous. Did she truly think that he could forget? That she could block out her emotions? If it was one thing he had learned, you couldn’t trick your heart.
Now we can follow you back home but we won't.
Is this what you had waited for? Just to be alone?
Obi-Wan refused to follow Siri’s way of thinking. Unlike her, he embraced his feelings instead of blocking them. Painful as it was, it was better then pretending nothing had happened between them.
He often wondered how she felt about all this. Did she regret her decision? Did she miss him like he missed her?
It takes some time to let you go and it shows.
Cause all we know is falling, it falls.
Remember, cause I know that we won't forget at all.
Obi-Wan suddenly became aware that several members of the class were stirring and that the Jedi Professor was calling names. Apparently they were splitting off in pairs of two. To discuss the lesson, perhaps? He vaguely wondered if his name had been called already. Just as he thought this he heard the professor announce his name.
“Kenobi, Obi-Wan and…Tachi, Siri. You willstudy and discuss the lesson together.”
Obi-wan felt himself give an involuntary flinch. He noticed Siri’s back stiffen suddenly, although she still refused to look at him. Then she slowly stood and turned towards him. Her eyes remained averted as she walked over. Soon they were standing face to face.
You never, you never said
This wasn't what you wanted, was it? Was it?
Siri’s discomfort radiated off her in waves. Obi-Wan knew she was trying to push down her emotions, to forget, but how could she contradict her feelings when they were standing right in front of her?
This isn't what you wanted.
This isn't what you wanted!
“Hello” she said crisply, without emotion. She studied her hands intently. \
“Hello” Obi-Wan replied quietly. He watched her face closely. He knew he was making her uncomfortable, but still he kept his eyes focused on her features. “How are you?”
“Fine” she snapped at him. Obi-Wan noticed that her hands were shaking.
Automatically he reached over and clasped her hands in his own. She froze at his touch but did not jerk away. “Siri, look at me. Please.”
Cause all we know is falling, it falls.
Remember, cause I know that we won't forget at all.
Siri’s eyes darted up and he saw that they were full of tears.
“You promised you would never remind me” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper.
Obi-Wan answered her in an equally soft tone. “Is it me who has reminded you though? Or did you just never forget?”
Blue eyes met blue eyes for a seemingly never ending moment. Then Siri pulled her hands away, breaking contact.
“I’m sorry” she whispered, wiping her face.
Obi-Wan felt his throat tighten. “So am I.”
~End~
Tue Feb 17, 2009 7:08 pm
